11 Things I Wish I’d Known Before Getting Married

Here are some great nuggets of advice I wish I’d known years ago…


1.  Eternal Bliss

Make room for reality, sister, because here it comes and it’s looking for a place to take up residence. Your relationship may seem like perfection right now, but eventually the rainbows and butterflies will diminish, and the euphoria of being-in-love will disappear! In fact, in the US the average honeymoon period lasts only 6.7 months. Yikes! Now, it’s only natural that the fuzzy feelings fade; but by knowing that this change is inevitable, you can better prepare for this transition and not question whether getting married was a mistake.

11 Things I Wish I’d Known Before Getting Married

Hindsight is 20/20

2.  “I’m sorry – so sorry!”

Forgiveness is a biggie. It’s never too late to apologize. This heartfelt act has is a sign of strength and maturity. You may have the memory of the hurt you inflicted, but keep reminding yourself that it has been reconciled; the pain of the memory will eventually dissipate. Don’t forget: forgiveness is also for yourself, not just for the other person. Some relationship experts say that you should apologize even if you don’t think it’s your fault, just to make your spouse feel better and to avoid a fight.

3.  Money, money, money…muh-nee. Money!

Did you sing it? I love Donald Trump and The Apprentice, because I know there is always more to be learned when it comes to finances. Find a great financial planner, because for married couples money is the number one source of contention and root cause of disagreements.  A healthy approach to get on the same page with one another, financially speaking is to:

a.  Decide how much, as a couple, you’ll give away

b.  Decide how much you’ll put in savings

c.  As accurately as possible, decide your total cost of living expenses

d.  Come clean about any debt either of you have

e.  Decide on separate or joint accounts, and who will be the keeper of the books

f.  Agree that you’ll consult each other before spending more than $__ (an amount you both decided on)

Pages: 1 2 3 4 5

Avatar of Shelly Carter

Born and raised in Texas, Shelly is currently studying to receive her Master's Degree in Publishing at the University of Houston - Victoria.  Shelly is a writer for Urbanette Magazine, and loves "everything it is and all that it offers our readers, and to me personally". She is passionate about life, family, friends, her maltipoo, Truman. She is a lover of all things culinary and the arts (13 year veteran of ballet).

Reader Discussion: 172 Comments

  1. Avatar of Sarah Kime

    Sarah Kime

    I don’t understand how some of Y’all are getting married after only a year of dating, that’s not long enough to know that person completely. I need like 6-7years of serious commitment before I’d get on a knee.

  2. Avatar of Bonita Paladino

    Bonita Paladino

    This article is very helpful. A friend of mine is getting a divorce, this might save their relationship.

  3. Avatar of Erika Gillette

    Erika Gillette

    I am currently getting an advice because I think that I and my partner should get a divorce because we are both with our new lovers. We have a kid, and my daughter is still not aware that we are breaking up.

    • Avatar of Tammy Harrell

      Tammy Harrell

      too bad, the kid will really get hurt. Just be considerate of the kid’s feelings.

  4. Avatar of Jessie Valencia

    Jessie Valencia

    The language of love? for men? No, they don’t know how to speak that.

  5. Avatar of Christy Book

    Christy Book

    No regrets. Maybe you are not meant for each other that’s why your marriage is a failure. Always think on the brighter side. ?

  6. Avatar of Christine Stephens

    Christine Stephens

    I am lucky to have a good listener partner. Whenever we argue, he will just listen. After scolding him, he will just kiss me tight and whisper in my ears how much he loves me. It’s the best feeling, knowing that he just listen, but he never understands what I said. LOL HAHAHA ?

    • Avatar of Jody Williams

      Jody Williams

      WTH. This made my day, but it is true. Men are most likely like that.

  7. Avatar of Victoria Carson

    Victoria Carson

    Haha! OMG, I remember when my mother-in-law freaked out because my husband told her that we are getting married. Yes, I worked hard for her approval. ?

  8. Avatar of Kelly Dziedzic

    Kelly Dziedzic

    Honestly speaking, sex is very important. Some women think that men just want sex because it’s satisfying, but men want it because they feel the love while having sex.

  9. Avatar of Raquel Kepner

    Raquel Kepner

    The marriage fails because you did not work for it. If you do love your partner, you will do your best work for it.

    • Avatar of Patty Aguilar

      Patty Aguilar

      What if his/her partner was the one who wants to break the marriage? Is it still on the other one’s fault for night fighting for it?

  10. Avatar of Angela Linville

    Angela Linville

    I’m starting to love this magazine. At first, it’s just a past time when I have a free time. But now, I find myself looking for new articles because everything here is informative.

Load 10 more comments

Join in the Conversation! Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Urbanette moderates and edits comments for grammar and to facilitate an informed, substantive, civil conversation. Abusive, profane, promotional, misleading, incoherent or off-topic comments will be rejected. Please use your full name. Moderators can only approve comments written in English.

All content is strictly copyright. Contact us for permission.