11 Things I Wish I’d Known Before Getting Married
Here are some great nuggets of advice I wish I’d known years ago…
1. Eternal Bliss
Make room for reality, sister, because here it comes and it’s looking for a place to take up residence. Your relationship may seem like perfection right now, but eventually the rainbows and butterflies will diminish, and the euphoria of being-in-love will disappear! In fact, in the US the average honeymoon period lasts only 6.7 months. Yikes! Now, it’s only natural that the fuzzy feelings fade; but by knowing that this change is inevitable, you can better prepare for this transition and not question whether getting married was a mistake.
2. “I’m sorry – so sorry!”
Forgiveness is a biggie. It’s never too late to apologize. This heartfelt act has is a sign of strength and maturity. You may have the memory of the hurt you inflicted, but keep reminding yourself that it has been reconciled; the pain of the memory will eventually dissipate. Don’t forget: forgiveness is also for yourself, not just for the other person. Some relationship experts say that you should apologize even if you don’t think it’s your fault, just to make your spouse feel better and to avoid a fight.
3. Money, money, money…muh-nee. Money!
Did you sing it? I love Donald Trump and The Apprentice, because I know there is always more to be learned when it comes to finances. Find a great financial planner, because for married couples money is the number one source of contention and root cause of disagreements. A healthy approach to get on the same page with one another, financially speaking is to:
a. Decide how much, as a couple, you’ll give away
b. Decide how much you’ll put in savings
c. As accurately as possible, decide your total cost of living expenses
d. Come clean about any debt either of you have
e. Decide on separate or joint accounts, and who will be the keeper of the books
f. Agree that you’ll consult each other before spending more than $__ (an amount you both decided on)