11 Things I Wish I’d Known Before Getting Married

Here are some great nuggets of advice I wish I’d known years ago…


7. Thinkers vs. Feelers

Men versus women, blue versus pink. Recognize that men and women are different and they process things differently. Men are typically thinkers and rely on logic while women are typically feelers and rely on feelings. Learn to appreciate your spouse’s reasoning and try to understand it!  And as I already mentioned, always be quick to apologize. You will end up laughing at one another rather than fighting.

8. I Heard You, But I’m Not Listening!

11 Things I Wish I’d Known Before Getting Married

There is nothing more powerful than the art of listening (and it is an art!) Listening opens up a line of communication and understanding unlike any other action. Take the time to respond to your spouse by listening closely before thinking of your response, and see what kind of reaction you get. I promise it will be positive.

9.  Speak the Language of Love

I’m not talking about learning French; I’m talking about learning your spouse’s love language! Think about what your spouse would say you do that speaks love to him/her. Does he feel loved when you spend quality time or cook for him? Does he feel loved when you kiss him or hold his hand? Does he feel loved by your words of encouragement and appreciation? Find the ways your spouse feels loved and do them — regularly!

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Born and raised in Texas, Shelly is currently studying to receive her Master's Degree in Publishing at the University of Houston - Victoria.  Shelly is a writer for Urbanette Magazine, and loves "everything it is and all that it offers our readers, and to me personally". She is passionate about life, family, friends, her maltipoo, Truman. She is a lover of all things culinary and the arts (13 year veteran of ballet).

    Reader Discussion: 172 Comments

    1. Sarah Kime

      I don’t understand how some of Y’all are getting married after only a year of dating, that’s not long enough to know that person completely. I need like 6-7years of serious commitment before I’d get on a knee.

    2. Bonita Paladino

      This article is very helpful. A friend of mine is getting a divorce, this might save their relationship.

    3. Erika Gillette

      I am currently getting an advice because I think that I and my partner should get a divorce because we are both with our new lovers. We have a kid, and my daughter is still not aware that we are breaking up.

      • Tammy Harrell

        too bad, the kid will really get hurt. Just be considerate of the kid’s feelings.

    4. Jessie Valencia

      The language of love? for men? No, they don’t know how to speak that.

    5. Christy Book

      No regrets. Maybe you are not meant for each other that’s why your marriage is a failure. Always think on the brighter side. ?

    6. Christine Stephens

      I am lucky to have a good listener partner. Whenever we argue, he will just listen. After scolding him, he will just kiss me tight and whisper in my ears how much he loves me. It’s the best feeling, knowing that he just listen, but he never understands what I said. LOL HAHAHA ?

      • Jody Williams

        WTH. This made my day, but it is true. Men are most likely like that.

    7. Victoria Carson

      Haha! OMG, I remember when my mother-in-law freaked out because my husband told her that we are getting married. Yes, I worked hard for her approval. ?

    8. Kelly Dziedzic

      Honestly speaking, sex is very important. Some women think that men just want sex because it’s satisfying, but men want it because they feel the love while having sex.

    9. Raquel Kepner

      The marriage fails because you did not work for it. If you do love your partner, you will do your best work for it.

      • Patty Aguilar

        What if his/her partner was the one who wants to break the marriage? Is it still on the other one’s fault for night fighting for it?

    10. Angela Linville

      I’m starting to love this magazine. At first, it’s just a past time when I have a free time. But now, I find myself looking for new articles because everything here is informative.

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