Your One-A-Month Sex Bucket List

20 creative things to do every month to spice up your sex life.


Bucket List: #6. Give Him a Sensual Massage

There’s nothing like a naked, oily rubdown to get you in the mood. Put a large towel down on the bed and have your partner lie on his stomach. Using scented massage oil, rub his back, shoulders, arms, neck, and head with your hands. When he’s nice and relaxed, surprise him by sliding your naked upper body up his back from his waist to his shoulders. Gently lick and nibble on his earlobes as you lie on his back and continue to rub his arms. There’s a good chance the massage portion of the evening won’t last much longer.

Your One-A-Month Sex Bucket List

Bucket List: #7. Talk Dirty

Whispering dirty little nothings in your partner’s ear during foreplay is guaranteed to up the ante. Tell him you’ve been thinking about ripping his clothes off all day and that you can’t possibly wait one more minute to feel him inside you. As things heat up, speak a little louder and get a little dirtier. You can also ask about your partner’s fantasies and encourage him to return the aural favor.

Bucket List: #8. Read Erotica

The recent surge in popularity of books like Fifty Shades of Grey has brought erotica to the mainstream. But instead of cowering under the blankets with a flashlight to read it, why not read passages out loud to your partner? It might feel awkward at first, but I bet you won’t even make it through the first sexy scene before you’re creating your very own.

Bucket List: #9. Use Sex Toys

Take a naughty little trip to your local couple-friendly adult store together and pick out some fun props. Don’t be embarrassed—the clerks have seen it all and won’t judge you. They can even answer any questions you might have about various products.

Your One-A-Month Sex Bucket List

Have fun tying each other up with some fuzzy handcuffs or try warming lube, which will heat up your genitals and heighten sensation. Another great option is to pick out a dildo (penis-shaped sex toy) or vibrator (vibrating sex toy that can be shaped like a penis or something else) to use together—they come in all shapes and sizes for the most demure to the wildest girl. Men can also enjoy the vibrating sensation of a toy on their penis.

Bucket List: #10. Watch a Dirty Movie

Porn used to be the exclusive domain of men, but there are plenty of couple-friendly options to choose from these days. Adam & Eve and Digital Playground offer a range of high-quality productions with sexy storylines that are more enticing to women than the traditional male-oriented fare.

For example, Pirates and Pirates II: Stagnetti’s Revenge are modeled on the Pirates of the Caribbean movie franchise and have received positive reviews from women worldwide. You can find these and other movies for purchase online or at your local adult store. Or check out websites like and for an extensive range of female- and couple-friendly films.

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Avatar of Sabrina Rogers-Anderson

Sabrina is the author of 'A Fantastic Sex Life… And How to Get It!' Her work has been published in numerous print magazines and websites, including Women’s Fitness, Men’s Fitness, Men’s Health,, Good Health, Australian Women’s Weekly, body+soul, Runner’s World, Kidspot, ninemsn Health & Wellbeing, FHM (monthly “Ask Sabrina” column), MAXIM, Ralph, Eat Fit and ZOO Weekly.

Reader Discussion: 152 Comments

  1. Avatar of Christiaan


    I love the idea off a sex bucket list, think it can make sex more interesting and exciting. Must admit that some of the things we have done but have never engaged in a threesome and it is something that we both fantasize about and talk about, unfortunately here in South Africa people are still very conservative when it comes to sex.

  2. Avatar of paco


    How sad is this list? My wife and I did most of these within the first year of dating. If this list is something you need to spice up your sex life, you are really missing out on how good sex can be with each other.

  3. Avatar of Ruby Collins

    Ruby Collins

    My husband and I don’t have that time to have sexual intercourse. It’s sad, but I do miss him. Whenever I’m in the mood, he’s not. I think I need this to spice up our love time. I hope it works.

  4. Avatar of David Ramirez

    David Ramirez

    I will try these! Damn, these are interesting. I like the playing of food. I will try putting ice cream on her body and slowly lick it. Isn’t that nice?

  5. Avatar of Mildred Davis

    Mildred Davis

    Cross things off your sexual bucket list before you start having back and knee problems.

  6. Avatar of Jane Reed

    Jane Reed

    Sex on a balcony on Bourbon Street is on my sexual bucket list. Also sex in the cab like in Taxicab Confessions. I always wanted to do that.

  7. Avatar of Elizabeth Coleman

    Elizabeth Coleman

    I just want everyone to know that one of my biggest sexual fantasies include sharing a hot Krispy Kreme doughnut with someone and I can finally check that off of my bucket list.

  8. Avatar of Cheryl Reeves

    Cheryl Reeves

    Make a sexual bucket list. I suggest keeping as many of these as you can. I’ve checked off quite a few including watching each other masturbate. You will notice your partner look at you differently as you do it.

    • Avatar of Emanuel Terry

      Emanuel Terry

      I don’t think I can masturbate in front of my wife. It’s nasty. It should be done when you are alone.

  9. Avatar of Diane Cox

    Diane Cox

    Thank you Urbanette for posting this bucketlist! You’ve given me some ideas to spruce up our sexual time. I’m very much happy!

  10. Avatar of Ana Drake

    Ana Drake

    What’s on your sexual bucket list? I feel lucky to have been able to live such an open lifestyle full of experiences the past 12 years. What would be your ultimate experience? Don’t be shy.

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