Men Answer Your Questions About Love

Is your man in love? Will he fall for you? Men answer: How to tell.


Should I give him an ultimatum?

My live-in boyfriend and I have been seeing each other for about a year and a half, living together for somewhere around six months. I’m 31 and my family is giving me a hard time — like I should just go ahead and move on if he’s not going to be the one because I’m wasting time. My best friend even says to me that there’s no way he’s going to marry me because he’s getting all the sex of a non-married relationship without the commitment. I’ve debated a lot about giving him an ultimatum or a deadline, but something tells me that’s a bad idea. How will I know if he’s ever going to be ready to make the next step?

Men Answer Your Questions About Love

Men Answer Your Questions About LoveYou may think that men are afraid of the marriage commitment because we want to leave options open, because we’re waiting for something better, or because we fear it’ll be the official end of hot-tub sex. Jay, 30, says a man’s hesitation isn’t about indifference; it’s actually the opposite. “Men are just as unsure about the relationship thing as women,” he says. “I’m getting married in a couple months to a woman I love deeply, who I know will be a fantastic wife and mother to my future children. Is she my soul mate? Tough question, but if not, she’s pretty darn close.” When we decide we want to be married, we want to do the right thing — for both of us. So should you give him an ultimatum? I don’t think so. If you’ve been honest with him about your feelings for him — for him, not for “the relationship” — then you’re probably at the point in your relationship where you should be able to ask him straight up about his feelings for you. If he can’t tell you what he thinks and what he feels, well, that’s probably your answer.

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Avatar of Sarah Woodstock

Sarah enlightens us on a daily basis with the newest trends as (and often before) they transpire. She is the consummate globe trotter. Having traveled to over 70 countries, she earns her living writing, blogging ( and modeling while on the road. In her spare time she gets manicures, suntans on yachts in Greece, shops for even more shoes, and lives in the limelight. She loves photography, elephants, sailboats, bangles and ballet flats.

Reader Discussion: 91 Comments

  1. Avatar of ariel myers

    ariel myers

    92% wow. just wow! guess all my exes are the 8% that sucks.

  2. Avatar of Janet Day

    Sorry but I think the whole “92% of men chose love” is BS.

    • Avatar of Mary Jamieson

      Mary Jamieson

      For a relationship to work, there needs to be give and take. Men can’t do all the work. LOL

  3. Avatar of Edwina Thornhill

    Edwina Thornhill

    They say that men are simple-minded and women are the complicated ones, but I find it hard to understand most guys.

  4. Avatar of Jennifer Kirkpatrick

    Jennifer Kirkpatrick

    It’s society’s fault that women aren’t as assertive as most men. We got used to just waiting for men to ask us out. I feel sorry for the guys who aren’t as brave as the others.

    • Avatar of Agnes Hoots

      Agnes Hoots

      I feel this on a spiritual level. I’m only 25 but my relatives are more concerned with my non-existent relationship than I am.

  5. Avatar of Christine Wiggin

    Christine Wiggin

    I don’t like it when people ask me if they can be friends with me because my tendency is to always say no. I feel the same about relationships. I’d rather just let it happen. But I also get that some things need to be asked first.

  6. Avatar of Mona Murrell

    Mona Murrell

    Women give mix signals. They’re very hard to read. You’ll just get a migraine trying to understand them.

    • Avatar of Hillary Williams

      Hillary Williams

      I know it’s easier said than done, but maybe try talking to her about it? Maybe she’s just waiting for you to ask but you’ll never know if you won’t ask. Asking is the best way to get an answer. I hope this helps. 🙂

  7. Avatar of Diane Roth

    Diane Roth

    I’m shocked to know that 92% of men chose falling in love.

  8. Avatar of Isabela Quagliato

    I believe men need more understanding when it comes to matters of the heart. They do not speak what they feel which usually cause miscommunication.

    • Avatar of Joan Samonte

      Joan Samonte

      They love to keep everything simple. They tend to feel that crying is for girls. That is why the suicide rate is higher among men. That is why I always try to avoid confrontational talks with my boyfriend.

  9. Avatar of Amanda Wilson

    Thanks for writing, Sarah! Men and women need to meet halfway if they want to succeed in love!

  10. Avatar of Meiga Jenk

    Men are completely different from us, women. And it’s essential that if you love your man, you need to understand him and make sure he knows you do.

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