Relationships

Thinking About Cheating? 12 Reasons Why You Should

You may not have considered these…

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To cheat or not to cheat? Insert cliché: “That is the question!” But is that really the question? Now there’s another $64 thousand dollar question on the table – Is it bad to cheat even if I think my boyfriend won’t find out? Let’s find out…. just leave your ego at the door.

Thinking About Cheating? 12 Reasons Why You Should

It makes me feel good about myself – for a moment

Cheaters are usually insecure. Insecurity is a common theme in all our lives, and to seek relief from those insecurities is desirable, even if just for a moment.

Temporarily masking these insecurities requires ego-boosting actions, and cheating is a temporary quick-fix to satiate feelings of inadequacy. The cheater can gain satisfaction, like a temporary high, but risks feeling even worse after the act of cheating than they did before cheating.

They have bypassed dealing with the real issues and added a heap of guilt to the pile. A vicious cycle spins now because, without dealing with the underlying issues, the cheater may then feel the need to keep cheating in order to continue gratifying those feelings of inadequacy. Thus, cheating becomes a regularity, and the underlying personal insecurities have yet to be dealt with.

Personal inadequacies are legitimate, but must be resolved with self-confrontation. What is the number one answer? The survey says…get therapy!

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Born and raised in Texas, Shelly is currently studying to receive her Master's Degree in Publishing at the University of Houston - Victoria.  Shelly is a writer for Urbanette Magazine, and loves "everything it is and all that it offers our readers, and to me personally". She is passionate about life, family, friends, her maltipoo, Truman. She is a lover of all things culinary and the arts (13 year veteran of ballet).

    Reader Discussion: 155 Comments

    1. Ronnie

      I’m regretting falling in love with my partner. To begin with, I fell in love with an alcoholic who later became sober within the first year of our relationship. Her sobriety is great, however it showed me the true person that was under the drunken lie. I adjusted my life to help her stay sober and it’s working for her, however it’s taking a toll on me and all the accommodations I’ve made to continue to be in a relationship with her. She’s pushed me away many times over the course of our relationship and even told me if she was me she wouldn’t be in the type of relationship she’s putting me through. She’s so inconsistent in her mind and heart that it’s stifling me now. I recently tried to pull away and take a break, to give her the space and freedom she wants. When I did, she kept reaching out and wouldn’t allow me to clear her from my mind. I came back and not even a week later she was back to being her lame, inconsistent, empty promising, over obsessed with her family’s approval (she’s Latina, deep deep deep deep deep obsession with her family of alcoholics who never knew how to show her love and affection) lackluster self in our relationship again. I have never cheated in any relationship I have been in BUT now I am strongly considering. Simply just to cleanse my mind, body and spirit of her energy. It’s a sad truth and reality that I’m faced with right now.

    2. Dean

      No cheater will let their significant other have access to their device which is why it has become so hard for people to get evidence of infidelity. You can break rules to get the peace of mind you deserve. There are only a few people who can pull this off and you have to be extremely careful. 
      I had to put up with a cheating partner for almost two years until I decided to get evidence since I had nothing on her. It was a tough decision but it was necessary!

    3. Nora

      Women cheat on men all the time too…. or at least think about it. I’m not sure why everyone is only focused on men cheating when I know plenty of women face the same problem

    4. Men who think they’re so attractive cheat. They feel like it adds a length to their thing whenever they cheat. Too bad, because no it doesn’t.

    5. Dawn Breedlove

      Excitement really dies. Eventually you’ll get bored of the thrill and what has become of that new found relationship of yours? Nothing.?

    6. Tara Todd

      I saw on my newsfeed once about the ad in the billboard when her husband cheated. Kinda thought it was real but that was funny af.

    7. Paula Wilkins

      I’ve heard it so many times that men who cheat will blame their partners for their inadequacy. If there’s anyone who’s inadequate, it’s the man who decided to cheat just because of petty reasons. Heard this a lot before and I’ve met men who are worse than the other. Men who want to cheat will find reason in their partners so that they can continue to keep on cheating. I pity those women who get victimized by them because there are times that they would blame themselves.

    8. Sarah Brady

      OMG at that photo of the guy who has a tarpaulin hanging on his neck about cheating. That is so funny ? CLASSIC!!!

    9. Maggie French

      Men sometimes argue that cheating is subjective and I’m like… ???

    10. Eula Cox

      I’m so glad I found a guy who cheated before but completely changed. I know some of you might say that I should watch out, but I know for sure that he’s changed.

      • MARIA

        Lucky for you, because most women have to deal with cheaters who won’t stop.

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